My name is Amanda and I’m a self-proclaimed findom. I love money, power, and men, so my transition from an online creator and webcam model to a dominatrix was fairly easy. Mastering the findom lifestyle and finding a paypig that suits your needs, desires, and expensive taste is all about your attitude. But it’s also about finding the best findom websites that offer the most potential.
If you’re interested in becoming a findom, want to learn more about the lifestyle, or need tips for finding your next submissive, keep reading. Below I share a behind-the-scenes look at my personal experience as a financial dominatrix plus tips for landing yourself a high-paying and obedient paypig.
So, grab your whip and your wallet, and let’s dive right in!
How I Discovered the Findom Lifestyle
I’ve never considered myself to be naturally controlling or overpowering. I’m your typical 30-something-year-old nanny by day and bartender by night. And while I don’t mind working hard for what I want, I’d much prefer to have it handed to me – or given upon demand.
I first started exploring different ways to make money online about 3 years ago. What started as a simple hobby quickly turned into a decent way to make money and get what I wanted, the easy way. I’ve flirted with the idea of modeling and acting but the industry is ruthless and job opportunities are few and far between. But then I realized I could make money off my looks and winning personality in other ways.
So, I started texting men for money and hosting web cam sessions for cash. And while I was making a couple of hundred bucks here and there, the work was inconsistent and borderline degrading. That’s what my friend told me about her sugar daddy. A wealthy CEO who was mid-divorce and in need of a beautiful companion for his business trips and charity events. He paid her good money to be his arm candy.
So, I decided to dabble in the sugar dating scene. And while it was so much better than texting random men for money, it still wasn’t the best fit for my personality. Most of the sugar daddies I encountered were overbearing, arrogant, and rude. I had a hard time playing the obedient, doting sugar baby who did whatever it took to make my sugar daddy smile. I needed something different. A dating scenario that put me in the driver’s seat instead of the other way around.
And that’s when I discovered the findom lifestyle. Financial domination offers all the amazing perks of sugar dating with a completely different power dynamic. Instead of being an agreeable sugar baby who doesn’t ruffle feathers but simply nods, smiles, and collects a paycheck, I get to be an empowered and confident dominatrix who knows exactly what I want and how to get it. I have no issues bossing my paypig around, demanding money and gifts, and reminding him why I’m in charge.
After exploring a few different findom websites I found several paypigs that each offered me something unique. One pays my rent and car payments, another lets me use his credit card for everything and anything I need, and the other one sends me random gifts and cash in the mail. I can call any of my submissives on a given day and demand exactly what I want. Some paypigs love being humiliated and insulted while others prefer being bossed around in a more polite and self-respecting way.
While being a findom may sound too good to be true, it’s not. But, you need to know exactly what you want out of the arrangement and not be afraid to ask for it. You also need a strong and commanding personality.
Below you’ll find my top 5 tips for exploring the findom lifestyle and getting the most out of your paypigs.
1. Harness Your Inner Goddess
The secret to succeeding as a findom is harnessing your power as the beautiful, confident goddess you are. I suggest making a list of all your amazing qualities and characteristics. Include things about your lists, personality, and accomplishments. The more you build yourself up, the more commanding and successful a dominatrix you’ll be.
I started with a list of my awesome personality traits. I find that these are the most important things to highlight since it’s your powerful personality that paypigs are interested in. You need to be self-assured and unapologetic among other things like confident, assertive, and borderline aggressive. Remember, your submissive is looking to you to take control. Your wish is their command. Take advantage of this power dynamic and put it to good use.
You can also make a list of your physical attributes to help build your self-esteem. For example, I have fire-red hair that embodies my fiery personality. My skin is milky white and my eyes are deep blue. Taking notice of all the character traits that make me feel beautiful reinforces the idea that I’m worth every penny my paypig gives me – and then some! You can also highlight these physical attributes in both your profile pictures and descriptions.
2. Find the Perfect Findom Website
Now that you’ve harnessed all your awesome attributes and you’re ready to find the submissive of your dreams, you need to know where to look. The Internet is a vast realm of possibilities, which is both a blessing and a curse. While it’s great to have options, it can also be overwhelming at times. That’s why I’ll share a few of the best findom websites I’ve found over the last couple of years to save you the hassle.
Believe it or not, FunwithFeet.com has proven the most successful for me when finding and securing the highest-paying submissives. Foot fetishes are all the rage these days and FunwithFeet.com attracts affluent men and women from around the world.
Here, you can connect over a shared love and appreciation for gorgeous, foot-focused content. But it goes much further than that. FunwithFeet makes it easy to build a loyal following, chat with your biggest fans, fill custom orders, and extend your relationship into other realms – including findom! Some of my highest-paying subs are also foot fetishists who love to buy me shoes and accessories while also paying for my pampering and pedicures.
Even though the sugar dating lifestyle wasn’t for me, I also found a few reliable subs on Private Sugar Club and similar sugar daddy websites. My recommendation here is to beware of men who want more than just your company in return. Some sugar daddies expect or even demand physical contact and intimacy as part of the arrangement. No means no, even online. After a few interactions, I decided a power dynamic where I was in control better fit my personality and slowly made the switch to being a findom over a sugar baby.
Some of the best and most popular findom websites to check out include:
Findom.com is one of the first and oldest findom websites online. With years of experience and a positive reputation, it’s as good a place as any to start your search for a rewarding findom arrangement. High-paying subs trust this platform and the easy-to-use website makes searching and finding eligible candidates simple. The only downside is that there are a lot more findoms on the site than paypigs, so you might have your work cut out for you as you try to stand out against the competition.
This is a great findom website for those looking for subs and paypigs in their local area. I normally don’t conduct my findom relationships in person, so I haven’t used this website much, but I’ve heard it’s a great choice if you want face-to-face interactions. LocalFindom lets you find and meet subs nearby who’ve been verified for safety and legitimacy. Some dominatrixes and their subs love to engage in humiliation behaviors together behind closed doors but then adopt more traditional roles in person, like going on dates and trips together. All of these dynamics require face-to-face meetings, which LocalFindom can help with.
For me, these types of findom relationships felt more like sugar dating, so I chose to keep all of my interactions virtual. Ultimately, the dynamics of your arrangement are between you and your paypig.
Since I consider myself a findom Queen who deserves the best treatment possible, I was instantly drawn to the name of this website. RoyalDominatrix places findoms on a pedestal and paypigs where they belong – groveling at your feet. The platform’s design screams royalty which gives it a fun and playful feel. One thing RoyalDominatrix has that a lot of other findom websites don’t is a live chat feature and private video sessions. For a findom like myself, who prefers to keep my relationships strictly online, these tools are invaluable. I also have webcam experience so live video sessions are second nature to me. The live chat feature also makes it easier to find and connect with paypigs in real time, which means fewer missed opportunities and more potential.
Last but not least, PayPigPalace has a great pool of subs to choose from. This findom website is geared more toward attracting high-paying and wealthy paypigs than it is about attracting findoms. For that reason, you usually have your pick of the men you want. As long as you have an attractive and engaging profile, respond quickly to messages and inquiries, and remain engaged, chances are, you’ll find at least a few prospective subs on PayPigPalace.
Other popular websites that I’ve heard of but never tried myself include
● Money Mistress
The great thing about these findom websites is that they’re designed for exactly this purpose. Eager and obedient men sign up in the hopes of meeting gorgeous and confident women who want to control and belittle them while demanding handouts. Each findom website works differently, though, so be sure to check the rules, guidelines, and any associated costs. Some platforms require you to pay a monthly fee to browse profiles, connect with other members, and access other tools and features. Most findom websites have private chats that let you bond with potential matches and create a mutually-beneficial arrangement.
3. Communicate Openly
Communication is key in any relationship and findom arrangements are no different. I am always upfront and honest about what I want and what I expect. Being totally transparent helps cut down on any confusion and prevents a disagreement or letdown when the other person doesn’t meet your needs or expectations.
After I meet a prospective paypig online, the conversation quickly escalates from casual niceties to business. I break the ice by asking a mix of personal and basic questions like:
● “Why did you become a paypig?”
● “How much is your annual income?”
● “Why should I let you be my submissive?”
● “How do you plan to pay me and how often?”
● “What type of power dynamic do you prefer?”
Asking questions helps build trust and mutual respect but, remember, at the end of the day, you’re the boss! So, show interest in your prospective sub without relinquishing any of your control. I always find out how the paypig wants to be treated. Even though I’ll be calling the shots and making monetary demands, if you want to create a positive relationship that works for everyone, you need to find out the other person’s preferences and needs.
For example, some paypigs want to be aggressively bossed around and commanded while others welcome insults and ridicule. There’s nothing worse than assuming your sub wants to be humiliated only to find out that this isn’t their thing and now the entire dynamic is ruined.
After you ask them a few standard questions, it’s time to start laying out your demands. I recommend knowing exactly what you want, need, and require before the conversation even starts. This helps portray a sense of empowerment and confidence. Submissives want a woman who isn’t afraid to ask for (or demand) what she wants. Here are the standard things you should know, at minimum.
● How much money do you want and how often?
● How do you want to be paid or compensated?
● How often will you be available to chat?
● Whether or not you want to meet in person
It’s also important to remember that no two findom arrangements are the same, so just because one paypig paid you cash on a weekly basis doesn’t mean every man will be willing or able to do the same. Keeping the lines of communication open and an open mind are key to finding a fulfilling findom arrangement, regardless of your experience level.
4. Set Your Standards High
There’s nothing wrong with having high standards as a findom. In fact, it’s a requirement. Powerful and confident findoms never settle for less and are unapologetic about what they want, need, and deserve. This needs to be you. Set your standards high going in and avoid settling or making major accommodations. It can be tempting to bend the rules if you find a paypig that meets most of your requirements. You may try to convince yourself that a smaller payment and fewer gifts are acceptable, even when they fall far short of your expectations.
This is especially true if you’re struggling to find a decent sub or have been without one for some time. My best advice to you is don’t settle! Patience is a virtue when it comes to finding the ideal sub. With enough time and persistence, you’ll no doubt find the perfect sub that goes above and beyond to give you exactly what you require. Set your standards high and don’t falter.
5. Create an Alter Ego
Now is your time to shine and be the beautiful badass goddess you’ve always wanted to be. Entering the findom lifestyle is also an opportunity to embrace and embody an alter ego or persona far from your everyday life and personality. For example, I work as a nanny during the day and my employers have no clue what I do after hours or that I have a handful of paypigs that worship the ground I walk on and hand over their paychecks and credit cards with no questions asked. That’s because I’m Amanda, a responsible nanny by day and Madame Mayhem by night. My loving demeanor by day changes to demanding and bossy by night and my paypigs love it.
I recommend you decide on your persona before you advertise yourself as a findom. You can always alter it later or switch it up to accommodate a particular paypig’s fantasy or needs – as long as they’re willing to pay, of course. You can also choose to be your amazing self if you’re confident and secure enough. Experiment with different approaches until you find the one that’s most rewarding – both emotionally and financially.
Join the Findom Lifestyle Today
And there you have it – my basic tips for joining the findom lifestyle and getting the most out of your experience. A few last-minute things to keep in mind before you go are to be patient when finding a paypig, not to compromise your standards or morals, and above all else, have fun!
This article is part of a featured content programme.(Published 11 October 2023, 12:06 IST)